Hello my fabulous friend
Today, I want to talk about your confidence and self-esteem as I know that sometimes you probably feel REALLY good about yourself and then other times you feel really bad (or quite bad) about yourself, this is often normal as after all we are human beings and we can’t escape doing things that make us feel good and then messing up and doing something bad that makes us feel like rubbish. I also think with the transition from Summer to Autumn (known as Fall in the US) a lot of us will feel more moody or down than usual as the Sunny weather does really boost our moods (especially with all of that vitamin D that it brings). So if you feel like “I need to really boost my confidence and self-esteem now more than ever, then keep reading as this one is for you”.
1. Value yourself:
Know that you have worth and value. The bible says that you are fearfully and wonderfully made. Know that God created you with virtue and so you are not a piece of junk but you are worth all the love, attention and happiness that you desire.
2. Read books on Confidence and Self-esteem:
One of the best ways to increase your confidence and self-esteem is to build yourself up by reading books that are on these topics. You can learn so much from wise thought leaders and authors that have taken the time to create these amazing books. One of the books that I will recommend you reading is “The Confident Woman” by Joyce Meyer and “It’s your Time” by Joel Osteen. These books are really encouraging and powerful
3. Take note of good things that people say to you and do for you:
You could create a folder or a box and add lovely compliments, testimonials, kind words and cards that people send to you. If someone buys you a present take a picture of it and put it inside your box. So whenever you feel bad you can look inside that box and really read all of those lovely messages, cards and compliments and remind yourself that you are completed loved, cared for and wonderful.
4. Never say negative things about yourself (EVER AGAIN):
Joyce Meyer has always discussed the significance of speaking positive to yourself and building yourself up with good words. Many of us do this from time to time, perhaps you make positive affirmations and that is wonderful if you do this. But how many of us call ourselves “Ugly, fat, stupid, clumpsy, silly?…etc” Do you ever catch yourself saying “I am so dumb”, “No one will ever want me”, “I can never come up with the money to travel to new countries”, “I know that I will never get a good job”, “Good things happen to everyone but me”, “I know that something bad is going to happen today” and the list goes on! We say these things then we wonder why we have no confidence and a poor self-esteem. So I want to challenge you to BITE your tongue, when you do something bad or when you make a mistake “admit it, say sorry, repent or acknowledge that you have failed but do NOT say anything evil about yourself. Don’t get into the condemnation party. Because this is what drags us down and makes us sin even more. Joyce Meyer says that we need to separate our “who” and our “do”. We don’t do everything right but we are still children of God, we are loved unconditionally by him and we have worth and value. Remember that if you fail to love yourself you will never be able to love others.
5. Compliment others often:|
Go out of your way to spread the love. Build people up each day with positive and encouraging words. You can compliment your friends, family, customers, clients, colleagues, neighbours etc. Compliment at least 3 people a day. Make it a part of your routine to reach out to three people each day and say something wonderful to them. It could be a text message, it could be a comment on Facebook, saying something nice to someone at your place of work etc. Don’t go overboard with this. Don’t sit down for 1 hour telling someone how nice their jacket is but just say random nice things. It is the little things in life that make all the difference.
“Congrats, well done for doing well in the competition Rick”
“Wow that coat looks lovely on you, Yellow really suits you Cindy”
“I love your new bag, it looks so nice Vanessa”
“You are such an amazing cook, that food was so delicious Aunty”
“I value and appreciate you mum, you are such a great mother”
“You are the best girlfriend ever”
“Thanks for borrowing me your hairdryer, you are such a kind friend”
“We are so lucky to have a great Manager like you Bob, you are so organised”
“No woman is more beautiful than you, I am so glad that I married you Kate”
“You have such big muscles Tim, I am so blessed to have a good looking husband like you”
6. Get into the BEST shape of your life:
Now, I am not a medical doctor or a nutritionist or anything like that so please seek medical or fitness advice from an expert before you take my advice on this one. However, I believe that it is so important that you do not only feel good emotionally but that you feel good physically. One of the ways to really boost your confidence and self-esteem is to get into great shape. When you look 20 pounds heavier than you would like to or when you look 10 pounds lighter than you would like to, it doesn’t make you feel very good, I know that we should accept ourselves (especially with things that we can’t change) and of course we shouldn’t hate ourselves because we are bigger or slimmer than we want to be. But I do encourage you to do something about it if you feel that this is really making you unhappy. If you don’t like your love handles or flabby tummy you can actually do something about it, you can decide to hit the gym and get into great shape even if it takes month and months. Likewise if you feel underweight you can begin to eat better to increase your weight so that you look healthier and feel physically stronger. I know that sometimes we blame everything on our genes but there are personal trainers, dietitians, doctors and nutritionists out there for a reason and I recommend that you see someone or work with someone if you would like to get into greater shape or health. Especially if you lack the motivation to get fit and healthy! You would be surprised at some people that started off being a size 22 and today they are a healthy size 12. So don’t think that it is impossible. Have faith and go for it. Get into the BEST shape of your life. You owe it to yourself.
7. Stop comparing yourself to others:
There is something as good old healthy competition but there is also something such as unhealthy competition and most of us indulge way too much in the unhealthy competition. Do you sometimes catch yourself wishing to be like another woman or man or wishing that you had their life, car, wife, house, boyfriend, etc? If so you need to stop that bad habit from today. Because the truth is. God has given you great things and all you need to do is focus on what He has given you, nurture these gifts, talents and things that He has given you and more good things will come your way. But if you decide to treat what you have as unimportant then what hope will you have of having new and more exciting things in your life. Sometimes we use others as a role model to push for more success. This is good as we never want to get too comfortable in life but make sure you are not obsessively comparing yourself to others as it’s not a good thing. You have no idea what people actually go through or what they have done to get where they are, sometimes all that glitters is not gold. So give God so much thanks everyday for your own blessings and for being you as you are perfect as you are.
And that’s a wrap! Thanks so much for reading my latest blog post and I hope you found it to be super useful. I wish you a grand and glorious week! An invitation to work with me 1-1, Festive Success Coaching: Good news. I am now offering Success Coaching, which I call “Festive Success Coaching” and I have 3 different packages:
1) 90 minutes (A one off Festive Success Breakthrough Session)
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If you would like me to book a FREE 30 minutes Festive Success Breakthrough Session then contact me today. Send me an e-mail to firstname.lastname@example.org and I will get you booked in, the session will happen via Skype and I will give you some free coaching on 1-2 areas that you are struggling with i.e. Marketing, media, social media, achieving your dreams, success, confidence, launching products or services, attracting clients etc. Just let me know what you need help with most via e-mail.
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I look forward to hear from you.
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